October 26, 2010
It's 1990:
Van Damme's in jail --
This time, undercover.
He succeeds despite the odds.
There's a plot
To kill and sell inmates.
Jean Claude plus broad ain't hot.
This romance subplot is random.
Lots of people pick on dear Burke;
In the shower, he is hurt.
He's on the list to cull,
Maybe the black guy is as well?
Burke's cover is blown,
The inmates catcall.
Shower guy is the downfall.
The mastermind is still not shown.
Hawkins disapproves,
But still tells Burke the news.
Burke ain't safe,
And neither is his "wife".
Keane's mean,
Voegler's on the team.
Voegy's got a gun --
Run, subplot broad, run!
Ah, the POLICE are harvesting organs,
Selling inmates for parts.
On goes the villain monologue,
Until Helen intervenes.
Subplot chick escapes, but not
The way Burke did from rape.
Did we lose our racial subplot?
Now it's the guards who taunt.
Somehow, Burke escapes his cell,
Freeing everyone else, as well.
Where are the guards?
Are they out, playing cards?
Alas, by inmates Burke is chased:
Randomly, they are stalled.
Guards nab our hero,
Though proving handling escapes zero.
Hero defeats shower guy,
Taking Hawkins with him, on the fly.
Is Hawkins' rescue foiled?
Nope; shower guy's nuts get crunched.
Flee--!
Riot still advancing.
Doctor getting shanked;
Burke at al get flanked.
Something's on fire,
Shower guy dressed as guard for hire.
Hawkins gets hit;
Burke's alone? Shit.
Shotgun-toting "guard"
Advances towards hidden Hawkins.
Hawkins was so smelly
That he was easy to find.
