Van Damme versus Derailed (II)

May 19, 2011

Austria, same army.
Poofy red hats.
Romantic tension;
A missing woman.

Bar bromance;
Big car romance?
Jack looks thoroughly
Unimpressed with being in Derailed.

Train station.
Some thugs.
Tic-tac theme.
"I'm rollin'."


They get on going,
Thugs get placed.
The Mullet Man kisses his cross.
[Bill's notes apparently missed a line]

"I don't have to be married..."
"I like married men."
Musician subplot!
Hooooh. The wife and kids arrive.

"This is my new client."
"I'm sure she is."
"You acted like
You were upset to leave us."

Looks like the marriage's askew.
Tell him, foo.
A shake up.
A hold-up.

Subplots converge;
Superspies hunt
While beep-boops start.
Scarhead runs the show.

Out two minions go.
Jack's pack get reunited.
"Mason's here?"
Aw, shit.. Constantine.

Classic death scream.
Gunshot!
"Mason Cole?"
"He's here -- on the train."

"Biological weapon?"
Oh. The pancake.
Sure.. take the vials.
Not like you won't get kicked.

The violin gets smashed.
So does the cowboy.
Scarface, despite his statement,
Makes a another deliberate statement.

On top of the train,
The bartender gets shot.
Gunfights unleash.
Jack makes an entrance.

Splitscreen action.
Aww, shit --
"Natasha!"
"Check him."